I wanted to do a little holiday shopping today but my mood was dampened when I found out that the two largest bookstores in my city do not carry gifts I’d actually want to buy.
“I’m sorry we don’t have Blind Rage, but we can order it for you.”
“I’m sorry we don’t have My Body Politic, but we can order it for you.”
“I’m sorry we don’t have Too Late to Die Young, but we can order it for you.”
“I’m sorry we don’t have Beyond Ramps, but we can order it for you.”
“I’m sorry we don’t have No Pity, but we can order it for you.”
However, they do have special books for special people. A whole special section!! Oh—correction—they’re not for we special people to read, they’re ON special people and aimed at parents and caregivers of special children.
Are you feeling warm and fuzzy yet? I dunno, this is not making me feel so special?… :-/
13 Comments
December 7, 2007 at 9:24 pm
Ugh, I feel special enough…to vomit, that is!
December 7, 2007 at 11:41 pm
Ick. I get increasingly tired of the plight of parents of children with disabilities - not because there is no plight, but because their plight is privileged so far above that of any people with disabilities that said people tend to be nothing more than symbols or metaphors for the parents’ martyrhood or sainthood.
It’s like they keep passing cookies back and forth.
December 8, 2007 at 12:48 pm
The parents are the worst. They try to infantalize their kids forever. They hold them back.
December 8, 2007 at 8:53 pm
And sometimes literally in a very scary way.
December 9, 2007 at 4:18 am
I LOVE Accident of Nature and everything by Harriet Johnson. I am surprised you found a disability section, I have yet to find a store which has ANY disability magazine, indeed the panic they have just trying to figure out what section it might be in “Do you think it might be with Tattoos? What about the Motorcycle Hot Rod section? Alternative Sexuality?” and I’m going, “We’re 1 in 7 and there isn’t ONE magazine?” And they are still going, “What about ‘alternative science’ like the Fortean Times?”
December 9, 2007 at 11:23 am
elizabeth, you’re so right. yesterday i was thinking how much i’m craving community right now and i think that’s why i love reading blogs by disabled people so much. it’s our voices and presence online.
as far as parents go… first i guess i need to say YAY for parents who do support their disabled children and know what an appropriate amount of support IS. parents play a big role in many of our lives/development.
still, i think a lot of the chunk of power we could have as a community is stolen by parents and nondisabled allies. nondisabled people (like legislators) give authority and voice to parents and we have to fight to be heard. for example, why did the white house choose to have special olympics torch run this year on ADA DAY, a huge day for the disability rights movement (that has nothing to do w/ special olympics)?? would it had hurt them to have it a week later and recognize the work of disabled people on the 26th instead of using the day as a platform to raise money for an organization that is known to be patronizing? or let’s take the protests around MDA telethons– if parents were saying how much the message puts us back, i think more community members would be up in arms (a lot of people think: oh these disabled folk don’t UNDERSTAND or they’re so ungrateful) even though it’s US the telethon is talking about.
i’m not sure if this is because of the history of disability advocacy— parents were some of the origianl rebelrousers back in the day around education. maybe it is the concept of advocacy in general, that it needs to be a person who has power for the “less fortunate”. maybe it’s because society gives credibility to nondisabled people v. disabled people about disability b/c they can connect better. or maybe it’s because when parents advocate, they may frame disability in terms of a burden (which is how most people view disability) that they’re dealing with whereas the disability rights movement frames disability in how inaccessible society is and people get uncomfortable with that.
?
December 10, 2007 at 10:57 pm
I had the SAME issue! <a href=”http://qw88nb88.wordpress.com/2006/12/05/wheres-my-shelf/”Where’s m shelf? And yeah, I’m not slamming those parents who feel that their children are blessings, but rather that all children are such – having a disabled child in the family does not earn a person extra cosmic brownie points. Gets rather nauseating, dunnit?
andrea
December 11, 2007 at 12:10 am
… man, I must be out of it. I had no idea children with special needs have souls that require a different kind of chicken soup.
December 12, 2007 at 1:04 pm
Special enough to vomit, indeed. I presume you know about Advocado Press?
December 13, 2007 at 8:47 pm
I have a book for you, er, that you might be interested in. Raymond’s Room by Dale Dileo. It’s on ending the segregation of those with disabilities.
December 14, 2007 at 3:37 pm
Too Late to Die Young and No Pity aren’t all that recent so I wouldn’t have expected them to be stocked in a bookstore. I think Blind Rage is more recent, although I don’t remember…. those are the three on your list that I’ve read. My library has copies of all three. Multiple copies of the first two.
December 14, 2007 at 6:31 pm
I understand exactly, whenever I go into a bookstore I look at the disability section and it is all for caregivers. Most of the learning disability literature is for parents and educators - I know of ONE book written for adults with LD’s. I end up reading about how hard it is to parent kids with severe LD’s, but there is nothing written for me, the adult with severe LD’s.
September 17, 2008 at 1:25 pm
Following my dad’s advice actually got me fired from one job. That advice made me an insubordinante employee.
And now I am in hot water with my state rehabilitation agency. I was supposed to have been sending them resumes directly for review vs accepting temp jobs (as dad had wanted) until I find a permanent job.
Being in my shoes is so frustrating.
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